Thursday, August 26, 2004

Tonight: Partly Cloudy, Tomorrow: Republicans

In less than 12 hours, I will be on a nonstop flight to New York City. This is quite exciting - I haven't had a vacation in far too long. And what's better than jetting off to the land of tall buildings, fast cabs and overpriced, well, everything? Not much.

However, while I'm basking in the joys of my vacation, New York will be invaded by...Republicans!

Yes, it just so happens that the lovely congregating of these people - the Republican National Convention - will be getting underway while I'm galavanting around the big city. Naturally, I've prepared accordingly.

I'm fully equipped with the First Amendment. In true liberal fashion, this is my defense to everything. It's like verbal pepper spray, and it works wonders on conservatives:
"You can't say that!"
"Actually, I'm protected by the First Amendment."
"What? Ahhh! The only amendment that matters is the second - guns, guns, guns!"

I'm also toting my razor-sharp wit. This will come in handy when they bring out the Botox jokes. I'll just unleash a stream of witticisms and watch in awe as they marvel at my quick yet cunning retorts. If only I had a Clinton T-shirt. Then I'd really be ready to hit the Big Apple.

At any rate, I'm very excited about my trip. I've never flown alone before, and what better time to try that out than straight into LaGuardia in the midst of a political bruhaha.

I've also never chased a shoplifter until tonight, but there's a first time for everything. He was scared of me, too. "Oh shit, the little girl's gonna kill me!"

A special shout-out to Erica - happy birthday! Try not to get so drunk that you don't remember it, because someone will, and you don't want the stories to be too embarassing.

And for anyone wondering, I'm obviously still on my streak of good days and nights or I would've blogged sooner. Yes, it is still good to be me.

1 comment:

TVonthefritz said...

God, I wish I was in New York. I love being surrounded by sexually repressed Republicans. I find their staunch wift of fiscal responsiblitly to be H-O-T.