Sunday, January 15, 2006

Lordy, lordy! Look Who's Forty!

It's me! That's right - here's the story.

I went to Kroger tonight to get some Gatorade for Tina (she's still a little sick), some Cadbury chocolate/roast almond bars for me, and some IBC cream soda for me.

At night, they usually just have the U-Scan open, so I went there to do my checkout. As I scanned my IBC, it informed me that I needed to show the cashier my ID.

I was a little weirded out by this, so I just turned around and said, "It wants me to show you my ID for cream soda. I'm 23 - I'm old enough to buy cream soda." I said this all very comically, mind you - I wasn't at all annoyed. I was actually amused. Wouldn't want underaged kids running around hyped up on sugar water. Actually, I agree with that. Moving on...

She said she didn't know why it did that, but that it also required ID for root beer. Odd. She then entered some random birthday for me: Sunday, January 2, 1966. I'm more than qualified to purchase cream soda. In fact, according to my birthdate, it's time for my must-be-some-practical-joke-from-the-powers-that-be sexual peak (how is it 18 for men and 40 for women? I know stats on this vary, but this makes the blog funnier, so I'm accepting 40). Bitchin'!

When I got home, it occurred to me: This is the PERFECT way for underaged kids to get beer! Get some cream soda, find some clear-bottled beer (MGD? High Life? I don't drink beer, and if I do, it's Bud bottles - NOT clear), and switch a few out. Go through the U-Scan, bag the goods, then turn around and say, "Hey, this wants my ID for cream soda. I'm 19. That's old enough for cream soda, right?"

I'm so good sometimes I amaze even myself

**Note: Don't actually do this. It's wrong. Get your parents or older siblings to buy your booze like the rest of us had to. Or date someone older - that works well, too.**

So my uncle moved back in with my aunt Thursday. Interesting.

I have a great idea for a social experiment for a drive-thru, but, alas, that blog will have to wait, as I have previous arrangements with IBC, Cadbury, and at least one of the following: Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Dead Like Me, Love Actually, and The Tao of Physics. Guess which is the only one you can't watch on a laptop computer?

If you said Buffy the Vampire're an idiot. Hit yourself for me - my arms don't reach.

For those keeping count, I blogged 169 times in 2005, which was 48 more times than JR. Sweet! You know, I used to look at 48 and see 4x12 or 24x2, but now all I see is 16x3. How did that happen? At what point did I start automatically dividing by three? I don't get my brain sometimes.

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